CEO Takes Ayahuasca — And It Changed Everything
Life has a way of humbling even the most driven among us. CEOs, founders, high-achievers—they all juggle deadlines, meetings, investor calls, and the constant pressure to “perform.” But what happens when someone at the top decides to stop climbing for a moment and look inward? That’s exactly what this week’s podcast guest, a CEO named Ryan, explored when he turned to ayahuasca, a plant medicine with a centuries-old history of helping people confront themselves.
Ryan’s journey isn’t about escapism. It’s about curiosity, self-compassion, and understanding that life is messy—and that’s okay. He starts the conversation by talking about meditation, something he’s incorporated into his routine for years. But not just any meditation—he practices loving-kindness meditation, a technique where you quietly repeat phrases like, “May I be happy. May I be healthy. May I be safe. May I live with ease.” You start with yourself—because if you can’t wish kindness for yourself, it’s hard to do it for others—and then extend it to your loved ones, and eventually to people you might even be in conflict with.
At first, it sounds simple, even a little cheesy. But Ryan is refreshingly honest about why it works. He admits that most of what occupies his mind—worrying, judging, spinning scenarios—is completely useless. He’s learned that when he consciously interrupts that mental chatter with these intentions of kindness, it softens his internal world. “It really reduces the duration and severity of those low periods,” he explains, noting that depression and stress are often less about what happens externally and more about how we relate to ourselves.
Here’s where things get even more authentic: Ryan acknowledges that starting with yourself is the hardest part. Many of us can easily wish health and happiness on our children, our partners, our friends. But when it comes to ourselves, self-worth issues creep in. “Maybe I don’t deserve it,” or “What’s the point?” These are the thoughts we carry. Meditation like this doesn’t erase the struggle, but it teaches us to sit with it without self-punishment.
This ties perfectly into a Buddhist teaching Ryan references, known as the “first and second arrow.” The first arrow is feeling pain, sadness, or fear—something inevitable in life. The second arrow, however, is feeling bad about feeling bad. That second arrow? It’s fatal. It compounds the suffering unnecessarily. Ryan points out that acknowledging your own struggles without judgment can be transformative. It’s okay to feel the hard things. It’s okay to be sad. Hard times are not a reflection of failure—they’re just part of being alive.
He brings the lesson home with a story from The Sopranos. Paulie, a mobster riddled with guilt, confides in his priest about nightmares and inner turmoil. He’s frustrated: “I did all the right things. Why am I still suffering?” Sound familiar? Many of us do all the “right things”—we meditate, we volunteer, we show up—but life doesn’t automatically become easier. Ryan’s point is simple but profound: life will be hard, but beating yourself up for the struggle only makes it harder.
So where does ayahuasca fit into this? Ryan explains that the plant medicine was a catalyst, not a magic fix. It forced him to confront parts of himself he usually avoids. Think of it as a highly concentrated form of the meditation practice he’s already been doing—a way to speed up the self-reflection process and bring deeply buried emotions to the surface. It’s intense, it’s challenging, and yes, it’s sometimes scary. But the insight gained can be life-altering.
Ryan blends this discussion of spirituality with the reality of his day-to-day life as a CEO. He’s not retreating from the world—he’s finding a balance. Meditation, loving-kindness, and plant medicine aren’t about avoiding challenges; they’re about approaching life with awareness and compassion, for yourself and others.
And here’s the kicker: he’s still human. He still struggles. He still has days where he feels low or disconnected. But the difference is that he has tools to navigate those moments without getting swallowed by them. He can pause, breathe, and practice kindness toward himself—even when life feels relentless.
Ryan talks about his cat, Bird, a famously aloof feline who only comes for attention during important conversations. It’s a reminder that even people who talk about deep personal work live in real, messy, ordinary lives filled with quirky, lovable chaos. And Ryan’s transparency, humor, and relatability make the episode feel like a conversation with a friend, not a lecture on personal development.
Here’s a warm invitation to you: share the wisdom, engage in the community, and explore personal growth in ways that resonate for you. I always emphasize safety and legality when exploring psychedelics, underscoring that this work is deeply personal and not risk-free.
So what’s the takeaway for the rest of us, who may never sip ayahuasca in a ceremonial setting?
- Start with self-compassion. Begin each day or each meditation by wishing yourself well. The smallest acts of kindness toward yourself ripple outward.
- Accept life’s challenges. Hard times will come, and that’s okay. Feeling bad isn’t the enemy—feeling bad about feeling bad is.
- Consistency matters. Tools like meditation, mindfulness, or journaling aren’t instant fixes. They work over time, especially when practiced during the small, ordinary moments of life.
- Humor is powerful. Even amidst deep self-reflection, allow space for laughter and lightheartedness. Life is serious enough; don’t take yourself too seriously all the time.
- Connection counts. Share your journey with trusted people, whether through conversations, communities, or mentorship. Hearing that others struggle too normalizes your experience and reduces isolation.
This episode of the Microdose U Podcast reminds us that personal growth isn’t a straight line. It’s a winding path filled with triumphs, setbacks, laughter, and tears. Ryan’s experience with ayahuasca is a vivid illustration of what happens when you commit to seeing yourself honestly, cultivating compassion, and daring to confront discomfort.
Even if you don’t have access to plant medicine, his story offers a roadmap: acknowledge your feelings, start with self-kindness, and approach life with both courage and humor. Because at the end of the day, being human is messy, beautiful, and worthy of gentle attention.
If you’re interested in exploring these tools for yourself, start small. Pick a meditation practice, journal for five minutes each day, or simply notice how you talk to yourself when life gets hard. Growth isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up, even when it’s messy, and giving yourself the grace to navigate the journey.
Ryan’s story, and this episode overall, is a reminder that transformation isn’t reserved for CEOs or people who take plant medicine—it’s available to anyone willing to look inward with honesty, courage, and kindness.
And if nothing else, let this be a reminder: even in our struggles, there’s always room for laughter, cats who nip at your hands at inconvenient times, and moments of unexpected clarity.
Much Love,
Dr. Dave
P.S. If you’d like to learn more about microdosing and starting your own journey, grab my free 5-part email course.
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Nothing in this podcast is to be taken as medical advice. Please consult with your doctor before microdosing. Also, only use these medicines safely where it is legal or decriminalized.
